It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
