some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
two words: eviction party
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
