This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
