Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
