Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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