i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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