Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize
