im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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