Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize