Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Ambien. No doubt about it.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
