im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
