i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
