There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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