Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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