how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
