Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
