Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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