Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize