i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
