Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I supernannyed him into submission
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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