i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
