so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
