I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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