I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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