Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize