Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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