Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Even my vagina gasped.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize