we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
