You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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