forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Randomize