I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
