i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
