you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
