help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Randomize
