try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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