none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
