have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
