They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I had to cum in my sink.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
