I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
