Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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