Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
