I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
