That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
