Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
