You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize