Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
