South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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