3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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