I just made out with a guy for $7.
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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