I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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