He is such a slut. More and more my type.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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